I had been continually exhorted to define my purpose in life, but I was now beginning to doubt whether life might not be too complex a thing to be kept within the bounds of a single formulated purpose.... So I began to have an idea of my life, not as the slow shaping of achievement to fit my preconceived purposes, but as the gradual discovery and growth of a purpose which I did not know.
Another take on the same idea, Instead of Your Life's Purpose:
]]>The idea is not that we will participate in one story that can be easily wrapped up by our biographers -- but that there are many adventures and quests that we can pursue. Rather than the attitude of the saint who is given a mission by God, it takes the attitude of the swashbuckling adventurer who goes out to seek his fortune.
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When there is only one possible source of meaning in our life, we adapt ourselves for efficiency: our goal might be to be a bed-net maximizer, win souls for Jesus, or stop Skynet. We make ourselves machine-like.... Instead of looking for a cause to devote your life to, you might try to become someone who is useful and level-headed in a crisis, who is well connected and makes friends easily, or who regularly has good ideas.
There can be a great deal of satisfaction in arranging your work efficiently... everything happening in a logical order, no wasted motion, no wasted resources. Think of a chef, and mise en place... chopping and measuring all ingredients first, arranging them in the order they're going to be added to the dish being prepared, making sure that all needed utensils are within reach. The chopping, measuring and arranging can be pleasurable in themselves, and once everything is ready, you can just COOK, paying attention to the sights, sounds and smells of what you're cooking, with nothing to interrupt the process.
Coincidentally, I've been making progress in my lifelong battle against clumsiness, and it came from piano playing. The goal of improv is for your fingers and your ears to get so connected, that you can play stuff that sounds good without your brain getting involved. I've been at that level for a while, and it's a nice plateau, but the only way to get better was to bring my brain back in. So I made the rule that my eye has to touch a key before my finger does, which forces my brain to form precise intentions and my fingers to follow. It's really hard, but it has carried over into stuff like putting forks away.
]]>]]>Thanks to DMT I'm an atheist who believes in an afterlife, but I don't think a god exists. I just think it's another dimension as natural as this plane of existence. One day maybe science will figure it out. But shit dude, I've been there and it's all math and fractals.